Forgiveness is Divine

King George IV, wishing to take the sacrament of the Lord’s Supper, once sent for the Bishop of Winchester so that he could administer it. The messenger who was sent to fetch him dawdled about and did not execute his work with haste as he should have. As a result, considerable time elapsed before the bishop arrived. This of course was to the great irritation of the king. When the bishop arrived, the king complained and inquired as to the delay. Having found out the cause the king commanded that the messenger be brought in. On entering the room he rebuked the delinquent messenger sharply and then dismissed him from his service.

When the scolding was complete the King turned to the bishop and asked him to commence with the ceremony. But the bishop would not. Mildly, yet with great firmness, he refused to administer the sacrament while any irritation or anger toward a fellow creature remained in the mind of the king. Recollecting himself the King said, “My lord, you are right.” He then called the offending person back, and, with great kindness and condensation, forgave him and restored the man to his position.

I don’t know much about King George IV. I don’t know if he was much of a military strategerist or anything of a valiant conqueror. One thing I do know though, he presented in that scene a valor and heroism that is beyond compare. That he could master his own anger and overcome his resentment shows that he is a man of great command.

But what is most glorious about his personal discipline is that he did not just suppress his anger. He didn’t just restrain it. He eliminated it. What’s more, he went so far as to demonstrate the one virtue that stands in direct contrast to anger. The king was able to demonstrate forgiveness.

Last week we talked a lot about anger. We talked a lot about the different forms of anger (such as bitterness and resentment). We talked about some steps that we should take to try and deal with anger. But this morning I want to talk to you about the true end of anger. You cannot say that anger has been really dealt with until you demonstrate a spirit of forgiveness. If you cannot bring yourself to this point, then you show you have not really stamped out the smoldering embers of anger in your heart.

It is one thing to keep yourself from outbursts. I would even say that it is a very good thing that you don’t have fits of passion where you blow up. To demonstrate that kind of control is a great virtue. But ultimately, you cannot be declared a victor over anger until you deal with the residue that still remains in your soul.

I believe that it is very good that we speak about this topic too. We have often talked about relationships, but I’m not sure that we have ever really dealt with forgiveness and what it looks like. We’ve talked a lot about church discipline. But I’m not sure that we ever really considered what we should do if church discipline works.

Throughout this chapter Jesus has been talking about broken relationships and how we are to engage in church discipline. But what is so immensely glorious about our exalted teacher is that he concludes the matter with a discussion of forgiveness. He shows us that it is not enough for one party to be sorry and to demonstrate repentance. The other party must concede as well. No one is allowed to harbor any sour feeling. In the end there must be reconciliation. And for that to occur it must conclude with forgiveness.

When it comes to forgiveness, there are a couple of things that Jesus wants us to keep in mind. I summarize it by saying we need to remember the breadth, height, and depth of forgiveness.
Jesus knows that anger has a tendency to linger. He knows that we are always looking for a reason to prolong our resentment. So He begins this passage by talking about how extensive our forgiveness should be.

I. The breadth of our forgiveness
In our passage Peter comes up to Christ and asks a question about the breadth of forgiveness. He says, “Lord, how many times should I forgive my brother? Seven times? Do you think that’s enough?”

Now the Rabbis at this time said that you should forgive your brother up to 3 times. That was kind of like the common consensus of the time. They said you are obligated to forgive them up to three times, after that you don’t have to forgive them. So Peter probably thinks that he is being really pious here. He probably remembered that Jesus said that your righteousness must exceed the righteousness of the Pharisees and scribes. Peter more than doubles the number.

But Jesus says, “Peter, you’re not even close.” Some people debate whether it is seventy seven times or seven times seven (490). I’m not sure that it really matters. The point is that no matter how many times he sins against you—if he comes to you and sincerely repents of what he has done, then you are obligated by God to forgive that person.

What the Lord is saying is that we must possess a generous spirit when it comes to dealing with a repentant person. And I might even go so far as to say that Jesus’ intent is not so much fixed upon that guy who offends you multiple times. I mean, how many times does that really happen? I’m sure it does, but I bet it is typically rare. Typically you don’t need to forgive someone 490 times.

I’m sure that most people don’t deal with repeat offenses all that often. If you do, you typically do something to break the pattern. We say, “OK, we’ve got to do something else.” If a guy keeps putting staples in the wrong way at work, you don’t let him stay on the staple machine. You put him somewhere else.

Repeat offenses are relatively rare. That’s why I think that Jesus is talking more about our readiness to forgive, than the actual number of times we need to forgive someone. I think he is telling us that forgiveness needs to be a way of life for us. In other words, we need to be ready and willing to forgive no matter who it may have offended us or how great the offense may be.

Isn’t that what really tests the breadth of our forgiveness? It isn’t someone who calls us up and says he’s sorry and then later that day does it again. The crucial issue is the hatred we can harbor in our hearts. There are some people that we don’t want to forgive. We like to be angry. We think we are justified in our anger.

Frederick Buechner, in his book Transformed by Thorns, once wrote: “Of the seven deadly sins, anger is possibly the most fun. To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving back--in many ways it is a feast fit for a king.”

That’s really where we have the most problems, isn’t it? It is not so much forgiving someone for the 70th time that is hard. The greatest challenge lies in forgiving someone for the first time. “But you don’t know what they did to me?” You are right. I don’t, but it doesn’t matter. Even if they had done it to you 100 times, you still must forgive him.

After stating how broad our forgiveness is, Jesus goes on to back it up with a parable. This is what I call the height of our forgiveness. That’s because the parable takes our attention to heaven and God’s forgiveness of us.

II. The height of our forgiveness
The parable has to do with a guy who owes a debt of 10,000 talents. That corresponds to almost a billion dollars. It is an amount that you could never pay back, even if you had multiples lives you could live. And this poor wretch can do nothing other than throw himself at the feet of the king and begs for mercy. He says, “Have mercy on me and I will pay back everything.” That, of course, is a lie. He could never do such a thing—and the king would have known that. He was just giving vent to an overwhelmed heart. It was no matter though. The king, out of his mere good pleasure, decided though to let him go. All was forgiven. Not a penny was held against him.

Jesus then demonstrates how absurd it is that we not forgive others. He compares it to the same servant who goes out and then demands that his debtor pay up. It was an amount of a hundred denarii; equivalent to maybe $50—a pretty insignificant amount by comparison.
Really, that is something we need to consider though. We all want to justify our resentment on the basis of the “offensiveness scale.” We say we have every right to resent them! “Just look what they did! They made me look like a fool.” Or “they left scars with which I still have to deal, even after all these years!”

But if that is the way we act, it just shows that we are not putting it in the context of God’s grace. We are not looking at our own offenses with the right lenses.

Do you recognize how great a sinner you really are in the eyes of God? Throughout the history of CRF I’ve quoted from the Shorter Catechism’s question that deals with the different degrees of sin. Question 83 asks, “Are all sins equally heinous in the eyes of God?” The answer then replies, “Some sins in themselves, or by reason of their several aggravations, are more heinous in the eyes of God than others.” So yes, some sins are worse than others. But we must never forget that every sin is heinous in God’s eyes. And can we even begin to comprehend how infinitely evil each infraction really is in God’s eyes?

God is holy. We say that he is infinitely holy. That is to say, his holiness extends farther than we can even imagine. I actually like what the Westminster Confession says when it talks about God. It says that God is most holy. How can you get more holy than simply holy? You can’t. but to stress the fact that God’s holiness is so incredibly pure, it says that God is most holy. Being that he is that holy, then even the slightest sin becomes utterly detestable.

I’ve used this illustration before. I say if you punch your brother in the nose, that’s not good. But if you were to walk up to one of the elders in our church and do the same thing, that would be 10 times worse. If you were to do it to our president—that I would not recommend, because you could get put in prison; or maybe worse! Now think about God, whose glory excels man’s by infinite measures. How offensive would that same act be?

Think about the very first sin. Adam and Eve at an apple. That’s not a very big thing in the grand scheme of things. Cain murdered Able, now that’s a biggie! But an apple? Come on! But what happened to Adam and Eve? They were cast out of the garden and separated from the bliss of God’s presence. He found that one tiny act so revolting that he had to get immediate separation.

Now when we compare the rest of our sins to that, will we ever really get an idea of how offensive our sins are? Probably not. Yet God wiped them all away.

That’s the context that must guide our forgiveness. That is what we must remember when we are offended. No matter how reprehensible a thing that person done, it is still a petty thing in comparison to what we have perpetrated against God and the grief that we caused Him.
Jesus adds one more thing though that is important to point out. While it is important to remember the breadth and height of our forgiveness, we should not overlook what Jesus says about the depth of our forgiveness.

III. The depth of our forgiveness [23-34]
In verse 35 Jesus says that when we forgive someone we should forgive them “from the heart.”
Have you ever forgiven someone from the lips? That is to say you said, “I forgive you.” But you really didn’t mean it. It didn’t come from the depths of your soul, it only came from the depths of your larynx. You might have spoken the words, but your heart wasn’t in it.

Kids are great at this. When we see them do something to their brother or sister, we get mad at them, and we tell them to say their sorry. So they turn to their brother or sister and say, “I’m sorry.” And we stand there and say to ourselves, is he really repentant? Of course he isn’t. He’s just doing it because he has to do it. He knows that’s what you want to hear, and you won’t get off his case until you do it.

My high school chemistry teacher was great at emphasizing this. He was a guy who you wondered if he had been sniffing hazardous chemicals a little too long anyway. So he was a little quirky. Sometimes he would catch a student chatting in the back of the room while he was trying to lecture. So he would yell at them and tell them to cut it out. Then the guy are girl would say, “I’m sorry.” And he would immediately yell back, “No you’re not!”

And we all know that is often how we are, not only when we are kids, but also when we grow up. We just have had a lot more practice at forgiving people from the lips, so it is a little more concealed. We can put on a little better show; maybe shake their hand or pat them on the back. It is only a stunt though. We only do it to get them to leave us alone. Or we only do it because we know God requires us to do it. So we mouth the words.

But that is all that it is. It is just a mouth full of words. After they walk away, we the embers are still smoldering in our hearts. And we come back from time to time to stoke them. We’ve buried the hatchet, but we left the handled above ground so that we can grab it again anytime we want!
God does not allow that. The only kind of forgiveness that he will accept is a forgiveness that comes from the heart.

Now remember what Jesus said on the cross. He was maliciously treated, and that was just by his friends. But while he was on the cross he said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Were those just meaningless words? You know, when you are being crucified, you tend to speak very little. And what you do say is typically only the things that you really think are important and the things that you really mean.

Jesus demonstrated this virtue. When he had every right to be resentful and bitter, he chose to let it go. He forgave those people, and he forgave them from his heart. And He calls us to do the same.

Jesus will not have any external religion. A theologian once said that Christianity is above all a religion of the heart. And Jesus strikes at the heart of the matter. Anger resides in the heart. And if you are going to deal with anger, you must be able to forgive from the heart. You can’t just swallow your anger. You have to be rid of it altogether.

Conclusion:
A story is told about two small girls who had a quarrel. The mother of one of them talked with her daughter and tried to show her the wrong of it and her need to ask God for forgiveness. The two of them then kneeled down to pray. The little girl began, “O God, please forgive me for speaking angrily to Charlotte and for quarreling with her.” So far so good. But then she went on to plead earnestly, “And make Charlotte come to me and ask my forgiveness. O Lord, giver her no rest, by day or night, until she is sorry, and comes and tells me so!”

Obviously, she had not reached the point where she was able to demonstrate true forgiveness.
It is no wonder why they say that forgiveness is divine. To err is human. Anger is one of our chief attributes as sinners. But to demonstrate true forgiveness—one that is as broad and high and deep as Christ requires, this only can be produced in us by the power of God.

Since we have the Holy Spirit dwelling in us though, we should make every effort to subdue the spirit of animosity. If we are off on our own and something or somebody continues to aggravate us, it is there that we must call upon God and ask him to help us. We must plead with him and ask him to quite the antagonism that continues to churn within us. But more than that we must ask him to give us a true spirit of forgiveness. For it is only when we are able to pardon that we can raise the flag over the city of our hearts and say that we have conquered our anger.